Category Scary

Awful Attic Books

As previously discussed, one of the great unremarked environmental hazards of attic mining is exposure to bad books. Mild extracts of these terrors are depicted in the photographs collected below.

Readers are encouraged to close their browser windows immediately if they experience any feeling of nausea or sudden affinity for the following subject matter.

The title of the first book is Blender Cooking. This is a euphemistic phrase for the construction of things which should not be — like green wobblies and blender mayonnaise. (Hint: those are also euphemisms!)

The result of consuming such delicacies? Melting eyeballs.

Front Cover


Green wobblies are always better with blender-made mayonnaise!

I'm blind!

The second book is titled But Maggie Wanted A PONY. Oh, really? It’s nice to want things! Unexpected bonus: a cameo appearance by Chuck Norris.

Front Cover


Back Cover

Finally, we have The Scrambled Yeggs — a detective novel penned by Richard S. Prather. In keeping with the style of prose, the front cover of the volume — painted by Robert E. McGinnis — depicts something vaguely salacious and offensive.

Try reading the back cover in the voice Billy West uses for Futurama’s Zap Brannigan. That is especially choice. Checkmate!

Front Cover

Front Cover

Shell Scott... makes awkward analogies involving clocks.

The Ominous Rustle of Leaves

Just can’t get enough of those ambulatory trees… what about you?

Caverns of Time

The “Wreck” series concludes… for now.


“The faded stencil could still be read: Project Crossroads.”


“A shaft in the vessel revealed strange machinery below…”

These pieces were intended to evoke that feeling of loneliness, desolation, and mystery which seems to cling to shipwrecks and other old ruins. The series is tentatively titled “A Wreck at the Gate of the Wind”.

Ghosts and Empty Spaces

The “Wreck” series continues… and further mysteries unfold.


“A torn page from a journal rested under the dry bones of the corpse.”


“Remains of indeterminate age were still inside the suit, trapped at the base of the stair.”

These pieces were intended to evoke that feeling of loneliness, desolation, and mystery which seems to cling to shipwrecks and other old ruins. The series is tentatively titled “A Wreck at the Gate of the Wind”.

Autumn’s Fallen Leaves

Continuing the “Wreck” series, we move toward the mysteriously beached and broken vessel, then pass within…

These pieces were intended to evoke that feeling of loneliness, desolation, and mystery which seems to cling to shipwrecks and other old ruins. The series is tentatively titled “A Wreck at the Gate of the Wind”.

Spook Country

I wanted to follow up on my last journal entry by posting a few of my daily sketches from about this time last year. Since I don’t consider them finished work, they’re going into the “scraps” section here, but any comments and responses to them are appreciated. I’ll be posting a few of these every day until Saturday — be sure to follow along!

These pieces were intended to evoke that feeling of loneliness, desolation, and mystery which seems to cling to shipwrecks and other old ruins. The series is tentatively titled “A Wreck at the Gate of the Wind”.